“Be a man.”
You might have heard these words before, but what do they really mean?
In today’s world, the traditional concept of masculinity is being challenged by rising movements like feminism and LGBTQ+.
With so many perspectives out there, it can be extremely confusing to understand what being a man really means.
Through my research, I realized that while there are as many perspectives on masculinity as there are people, a few core principles remain consistent. Learning these principles is the key to understanding masculinity.
That’s what this article aims for — introducing you the 12 Principles of Masculinity.
Why You Should Embrace Your Masculinity
Embracing the core principles of masculinity offers you an incredible opportunity to transform your life in ways you might not expect.
By understanding and living these principles, you can develop greater confidence, integrity, and a sense of purpose that resonates in every aspect of your life.
You’ll build stronger relationships, inspire those around you, and experience the deep fulfillment that comes from living authentically and with intention.
Sounds like someone you’d love to be? Here’s how to embrace the 12 Principles of Masculinity:
THE 12 PRINCIPLES OF MASCULINITY
1) Self-Reliance
Self-reliance is a cornerstone of masculinity, emphasizing the importance of independence, resilience, and taking ownership of one’s life. Here’s what it entails:
- Personal Responsibility: Take responsibility for your actions, decisions, and outcomes, recognizing that you have the power to shape your own destiny.
- Resourcefulness: Cultivate a mindset of resourcefulness and problem-solving, relying on your own skills, knowledge, and ingenuity to overcome challenges.
- Self-Trust: Trust in your abilities and instincts, believing in your capacity to navigate life’s ups and downs with confidence and determination.
- Autonomy: Embrace autonomy and self-sufficiency, valuing your independence while also recognizing the importance of interdependence and collaboration with others when needed.
By cultivating self-reliance, you empower yourself to chart your own course in life and overcome obstacles with resilience and fortitude.
“Self-reliance is the highest expression of self-respect” – Mokokoma Mokhonoana
2) Strength and Resilience
Strength and resilience are central tenets of masculinity, encompassing physical, emotional, and mental toughness. Here’s how to embody these qualities:
- Physical Fitness: Prioritize physical fitness and health, engaging in regular exercise, strength training, and healthy lifestyle habits to build and maintain strength and vitality.
- Emotional Resilience: Develop emotional resilience by cultivating coping skills, self-awareness, and adaptive strategies for managing stress, adversity, and setbacks.
- Mental Toughness: Strengthen your mental toughness through challenges that test your limits, such as goal-setting, problem-solving, and pushing beyond your comfort zone.
- Composure: Maintain composure and poise in the face of adversity, demonstrating grace under pressure and the ability to remain calm and focused in challenging situations.
By embodying strength and resilience, you build inner fortitude and the capacity to thrive in the face of life’s challenges.
“What doesn’t kill me makes me stronger” – Friedrich Nietzsche
3) Provide and Protect
Providing and protecting are traditional yet enduring principles of masculinity, emphasizing responsibility, care, and the safeguarding of loved ones. Here’s how to embody these principles:
- Providing: Take responsibility for providing for yourself and your loved ones, whether through financial support, emotional care, or practical assistance. Strive to meet the needs of those you care about and ensure their well-being and security.
- Protecting: Embrace the role of protector, safeguarding the physical, emotional, and mental well-being of those you love. Stand up against threats, injustices, and dangers, and create a safe and nurturing environment for yourself and others.
- Nurturing and Supporting: Nurture and support your family, friends, and community, offering your strength, resources, and care to help them thrive and flourish.
- Balancing Roles: Balance the roles of provider and protector with other aspects of your identity, ensuring that you also attend to your own needs, well-being, and personal growth.
By embodying the principles of providing and protecting, you demonstrate a deep commitment to the well-being and security of those you care about, fostering a sense of safety, stability, and trust in your relationships.
“I have no fear, I have only ambition, and I want mine, And I will do anything to protect and feed my family.” – Tupac Shakur
4) Courage
Courage is a fundamental aspect of masculinity, encompassing bravery, determination, and the willingness to take risks. Here’s how to cultivate courage:
- Facing Fear: Confront your fears and insecurities head-on, embracing discomfort and uncertainty as opportunities for growth and self-discovery.
- Standing Up for Beliefs: Have the courage to stand up for your beliefs, values, and principles, even in the face of opposition or adversity.
- Taking Risks: Embrace calculated risks and challenges that push you outside your comfort zone, recognizing that true growth often requires stepping into the unknown.
- Resilience in Failure: Develop resilience in the face of failure or setbacks, viewing them as learning experiences that contribute to your personal growth and development.
By cultivating courage, you empower yourself to pursue your dreams, overcome obstacles, and live a life aligned with your values and aspirations.
“Courage is not the absence of fear, but rather the judgment that something else is more important than fear.” – Ambrose Redmoon
5) Honor and Integrity
Honor and integrity are core principles of masculinity, emphasizing honesty, ethical behavior, and a strong sense of morality. Here’s how to uphold honor and integrity:
- Ethical Conduct: Behave with integrity and honesty in all your dealings, adhering to ethical principles and values even when faced with difficult choices.
- Keeping Promises: Honor your commitments and promises, demonstrating reliability, trustworthiness, and respect for your word.
- Respect for Others: Treat others with dignity, fairness, and respect, valuing their rights, perspectives, and well-being in all interactions.
- Dignity and Respect: Maintain a sense of dignity and self-respect, refusing to compromise your values or integrity for personal gain or approval.
By embodying honor and integrity, you earn the trust and respect of others while living in alignment with your moral compass.
“Integrity is doing the right thing, even when no one is watching.” – C. S. Lewis
6) Leadership
Leadership is a key aspect of masculinity, involving vision, influence, and the ability to inspire and guide others toward common goals. Here’s how to cultivate leadership:
- Vision and Purpose: Develop a clear vision and sense of purpose that inspires and motivates others to take action, aligning your leadership efforts with meaningful goals and aspirations.
- Empowering Others: Empower and uplift those around you, fostering a culture of collaboration, creativity, and shared success.
- Effective Communication: Communicate effectively and authentically, listening attentively to others, articulating your ideas clearly, and inspiring confidence and trust through your words and actions.
- Leading by Example: Lead by example, demonstrating integrity, humility, and accountability in your words and deeds, and serving as a role model for others to emulate.
By cultivating leadership, you harness your influence and abilities to make a positive impact on the world and empower others to reach their full potential.
“If your actions inspire others to dream more, learn more, do more and become more, you are a leader.” – John Quincy Adams
7) Emotional Depth and Vulnerability
Emotional depth and vulnerability are essential aspects of modern masculinity, emphasizing empathy, self-awareness, and the willingness to express and process emotions authentically. Here’s how to embrace emotional depth and vulnerability:
- Emotional Awareness: Cultivate self-awareness and emotional intelligence, recognizing and understanding your own emotions, needs, and triggers.
- Expressing Vulnerability: Embrace vulnerability as a strength rather than a weakness, sharing your thoughts, feelings, and experiences openly and authentically with trusted individuals.
- Empathy and Compassion: Practice empathy and compassion towards others, seeking to understand their perspectives, experiences, and emotions with an open heart and mind.
- Supporting Others: Offer support and encouragement to those in need, creating a safe and nurturing space for others to express themselves and seek assistance without judgment or shame.
By embracing emotional depth and vulnerability, you foster deeper connections, intimacy, and authenticity in your relationships and lead a more fulfilling and meaningful life.
“Vulnerability is not weakness; it’s our most accurate measure of courage.” – Brené Brown
8) Responsibility
Responsibility is a cornerstone of masculinity, involving accountability, dependability, and a commitment to fulfilling one’s obligations. Here’s how to embody responsibility:
- Personal Accountability: Take ownership of your actions, choices, and behaviors, accepting the consequences and striving to learn and grow from your mistakes.
- Reliability: Be reliable and dependable in fulfilling your commitments and obligations, honoring your word and following through on promises.
- Contributing to Society: Contribute to the well-being of your community and society, recognizing your role and responsibility in creating positive social change and supporting those in need.
- Caring for Others: Take responsibility for the well-being and welfare of others, including family, friends, and community members, by offering support, assistance, and empathy when needed.
By embodying responsibility, you demonstrate integrity, maturity, and a commitment to making a positive impact on the world around you.
“We never fail when we try to do our duty, we always fail when we neglect to do it.” – Robert Baden-Powell
9) Adaptability
Adaptability is a vital quality of masculinity, involving flexibility, resilience, and the ability to thrive in changing circumstances. Here’s how to cultivate adaptability:
- Open-Mindedness: Maintain an open mind and a willingness to embrace change, new ideas, and different perspectives, recognizing that flexibility and adaptability are key to personal growth and success.
- Resilience in Adversity: Develop resilience in the face of adversity and challenges, viewing setbacks as opportunities for learning and growth rather than insurmountable obstacles.
- Learning and Growth: Continuously seek opportunities for learning and self-improvement, remaining curious, adaptable, and open to acquiring new skills and knowledge.
- Navigating Change: Navigate change and uncertainty with grace and resilience, recognizing that life is unpredictable and requires the ability to adapt and adjust to new circumstances.
By cultivating adaptability, you build resilience, confidence, and the capacity to thrive in an ever-changing world.
“We cannot direct the wind, but we can adjust the sails.” – Dolly Parton
10) Empathy and Compassion
Empathy and compassion are essential qualities of masculinity, involving understanding, kindness, and the ability to connect with others on a deep and meaningful level. Here’s how to embrace empathy and compassion:
- Understanding Others: Seek to understand the experiences, perspectives, and emotions of others with empathy and compassion, listening attentively and without judgment.
- Offering Support: Offer support and assistance to those in need, demonstrating kindness, generosity, and empathy in your interactions and relationships.
- Showing Care and Concern: Show care and concern for the well-being and welfare of others, expressing empathy and compassion through your words, actions, and gestures.
- Promoting Justice and Equality: Advocate for social justice and equality, challenging discrimination, prejudice, and injustice, and working towards a more inclusive and compassionate society for all.
By embracing empathy and compassion, you foster deeper connections, understanding, and mutual support in your relationships and communities.
“Sometimes, the most influential thing we can do is listen.” – Bob Burg
11) Continuous Self-Improvement
Continuous self-improvement is a fundamental aspect of masculinity, involving a commitment to personal growth, learning, and development. Here’s how to cultivate continuous self-improvement:
- Setting Goals: Set clear, achievable goals for yourself that align with your values, aspirations, and areas for improvement, and work steadily towards their attainment.
- Seeking Feedback: Seek feedback and constructive criticism from others to identify areas for growth and development, and use it as an opportunity for self-reflection and learning.
- Learning and Development: Continuously seek opportunities for learning, skill-building, and professional development, whether through formal education, mentorship, or self-directed study.
- Reflection and Adjustment: Take time to reflect on your experiences, successes, and challenges, and use them as opportunities for introspection, self-awareness, and adjustment.
By embracing continuous self-improvement, you foster a growth mindset, resilience, and a commitment to becoming the best version of yourself.
“If you can get 1% better each day for one year, you’ll end up 37 times better by the time you’re done.” – James Clear
We just went through a lot of information so you may feel overwhelmed and that’s okay, because you’re supposed to be overwhelmed. Whenever you’re learning something new, the abundance of information will make you dizzy, that means you’re GROWING! Your mind is trying to piece everything and connect every ideas together, it takes time, so don’t worry about it and enjoy the process!
Remember the motto: “1% better everyday” is more than enough for a sustainable growth.
Feel free to return to this letter as much as needed. 😉
WHERE SHOULD YOU START?
“But wait Lucas, you said there’s 12 principles!”
You’re right! Here it comes, the 12th and most important principle of them all:
12) Living Authentically with Purpose
Living authentically with purpose is a vital principle of masculinity, emphasizing the importance of aligning your actions with your values and passions. Here’s how to live authentically with purpose:
- Discovering Your Purpose: Engage in self-exploration to identify your passions, strengths, and values, and use this understanding to define your purpose and direction in life.
- Aligning Actions with Values: Ensure that your actions, decisions, and goals align with your core values and sense of purpose, creating a life that is meaningful and fulfilling.
- Pursuing Passions: Dedicate time and energy to pursuing your passions and interests, recognizing that living with purpose involves doing what brings you joy, satisfaction, and a sense of accomplishment.
- Making a Difference: Use your unique talents, skills, and experiences to make a positive impact on the world, contributing to causes and initiatives that align with your purpose and values.
By living authentically with purpose, you create a life that is true to who you are, driven by passion, and focused on making a meaningful difference in the world.
“The two most important days in life are the day you born and the day you discover the reason why.” – Mark Twain
It is the starting point of your journey as a Man. Knowing exactly :
- what makes you, YOU
- and what your Purpose in life is
Here are four questions to help you reflect on it:
- What do you need in life to feel good?
- What do you value as the most important things in life?
- What are you naturally talented at?
- What is your purpose in life?
If you need help answering these questions, check out my 1on1 mentoring [link]
Thank you for reading me, it means a lot.
See you next week!
- Lucas
